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Lifestyle

Lifestyle, Nutrition

Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (P.C.O.S) awareness month

September is a month set aside to increase awareness of a condition that has for so long baffled scientists and until now, has no confirmed cure. This condition is called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, or simply PCOS.

Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) is a common hormonal disorder among women that is also one of the leading causes of infertility yet it remains one of the most underdiagnosed diseases in the world, with less than 25% of women with PCOS being diagnosed, according to Reproductive Science Center. Dr. Louis Chang, the MD of the PCOS Awareness Association writes that “PCOS affects over 7 million people. That’s more than the number of people diagnosed with breast cancer, rheumatoid arthritis, multiple sclerosis, and lupus combined.”

PCOS is characterized majorly by; irregular or absent periods, excess androgens (elevated testosterone and androstenedione levels), and multiple cystic areas on the ovaries.

I remember my journey to discovering that I had PCOS began after I had missed my periods for about 9 months. They were regular from their onset at the age of 14 until the age of 22 when my hormones took a turn. Although I wasn’t sexually active at that time, I did not want to take chances because 9 months without your period is a long time. This pursuit I will assure you is not a walk in the park, it takes your money, your peace, and let me not talk about the uncomfortable tests done like the transvaginal ultrasound. At one point, because of the heavy periods, I was using at least 10 sanitary towels daily for not less than 3 weeks. When I tell you your mental standing will be tried, this is one of them.

PCOS is known to present itself with infertility, heavy periods, and spotting between periods, pelvic pain during or between periods, mood changes, weight gain, fatigue, or low energy levels, excess growth of hair on the arms, face, back, chest, abdomen or hands and feet, hair loss or male pattern baldness on the head, acne, and insomnia or poor sleep.

Now unless you are familiar, this hormonal disorder is invisible, nothing seems out of the ordinary yet it leaves the bearer miserable who often time will not come out to say anything; you know why? The world has indirectly conditioned women to bear the pain, branding the one who is able to endure the most pain as a ‘strong woman.’ Most often than not, that pelvic pain, the heavy periods, you will be told that that is normal and women are different. No one often sees it as a problem because well, we talked to the snake in the garden of Eden right?

No one sees how one’s mental, physical or spiritual life is affected, constantly hoping for a miracle since up to this day there is no permanent cure, only the symptoms are dealt with from time to time.

My most recent appointment was at Bethany Women’s and Fertility Hospital in Luzira here in Uganda and I remember my gynecologist, Dr. Nsenga Joseph, a highly qualified fertility specialist taking me through the mini-lecture of where scientists have reached in finding a permanent cure for PCOS, what was previously thought to work only to find out that it wasn’t. We ended our appointment with the same thing that has been happening for all these years, dealing with the symptoms.

The dramatic weight fluctuations are frustrating especially when everyone around keeps screaming, “you have lost weight! you have gained weight!” but the control is out of your hands. Many have been labeled lazy. The inability or slim possibility of becoming a mother, making others a father, grandmother, uncle, or auntie leaves you weak in your knees making you feel less of a woman because truth is, we dread the question; “When are you going to start having babies?”

The trap is deep because many of us do not want others to worry or feel sorry so we push on quietly, burdened by the pain and constantly wondering whose son would want to be dragged into this mess if only they knew. Sadly silence does not alleviate, it only isolates.

Writing this is not comfortable for me at all but I recognize that there are many out there scared to let anyone know. We need to reach out for help because we are fighters who need each other, speak up for others who continue to suffer in silence or ignorance. Our stories will offer hope or consolation to those in denial believing that they are alone or crazy.

No, my sister, you are a fighter and you are beautiful. Just like I mentioned in this piece I wrote a while back, PCOS may be part of your story but it is not your story, it is just a chapter in your life book and you cannot allow it to rob you of your joy and laughter, it cannot dictate your storyline or define you because you are in charge of which way your life turns.

So to every lady out there struggling with PCOS, push through the pain, persevere, cry if you need to, fall but do not stay there. Positive is doable and it is possible, take each day at a time and rise above every obstacle and achieve the impossible.

Care for yourself as much as possible, continue to consume the right diet, take the medication prescribed, and exercise with utmost dedication. Do not compare yourself with others because you do not know their story and be kind to yourself. Take the opportunity to help others whenever the opportunity presents itself, Stay strong because it takes soul searching to accept the disorder we suffer. Remember your identity is not your symptoms. You are special and can be confident.

No matter what you are going through, each and every one of you is worthy of joy, happiness, and love. Be strong, you are not alone!

Lifestyle

The power of impromptu creativity

Impromptu refers to something being made, done, or formed on or as if on the spur of the moment. This is most commonly exhibited in a speech where one talks about a topic with little or no preparation. A nocturnal culture has slowly cropped up within a writing community that I subscribe to, Afrobloggers, where someone posts a one-liner and different people find themselves writing beautiful creations in the forms of poetry. I call it a nocturnal culture because it is usually during the wee hours of the night when someone somewhere has for some reason lost sleep.

The art of impromptu creativity has more benefits than one including, enhancing creativity, boosting confidence among creatives, benchmarking from experienced creatives to mention but a few. Given chance, please do not shy away from impromptu sprees.

The other night, I was feeling very uncomfortably hot in the wee hours of the night and I decided to share my plight with my partners in crime, a beautiful piece was created and I will share it here just to expound on the power and beauty of impromptu creativity. See what a one-liner created.

I am burning in my own skin……….. (Poets do your thing.)

I am burning in my own skin
My mind blanking,
my heart is racing
Look at me now, my walls are breaking

When I met you, I thought there’d be no stressing
But you acting like Mike Tyson, you got me punched in
I thought witchu it’d be different,
but boy, like so many other guys
you can’t keep your junk in

By Shadray, Check him out here

I am burning in my own skin
Fires coaxing every inch of my body
Crawling deeper with each flicker
The warmth I needed those winter nights
Burns
It’s not cozy here anymore
Though the hotter it gets, resilience is birthed
We never intended for this
Yet here we are
Burning both ways
We both ying
We both yang

By Sue Nyakubaya, Check her out here

I am burning in my own skin
I can’t possibly hold this in –
Much longer!
It gets stronger –
With each passing moment.

It threatens to rip me apart
But I don’t know how to start
Letting the world know.
How do I show
What could possibly be?

I’ll feed the passion quietly
Let it burn on internally
Soon it will be
Greater than me
And then, the world will burn

By Mary Kyohere, Check her out here

Lifestyle

The two stomachs that left her with burnt buttocks

Lose belly fat for your heart health

I don’t know what kind of life you are currently leading in this Covid period with all the craziness of the deaths, masks, washing hands and lockdowns at least here in Uganda. Grass has now increased it’s value with concoctions erupting each day leaving many with burnt faces as they try to steam away the virus. But who can blame them? Anything that can help to keep one from the oxygen mask sounds viable. But before all this, there were struggles which may now look trivial like getting rid of excess belly fat.

Sandra did not mind her excess belly fat which made her look like she had been created with 2 stomachs. You know those piles of flesh which make a distinct divide below your waist line? Yes those. She did not give them thought mainly because half the time she had no where to go. She was a stay home mother, working from home and only got to leave the house to buy some onion bulbs and salt when it got done. She got a few stares here and there whenever she went to church on Sunday but this was for a short time as she entered church or when she was leaving. Still this did not bother her much, after all she stayed away from the body con type of dresses which would probably have made her the center of unwanted attention. Once in a while when she watched television, there was a talk show of a famous herbalist who always talked about different ways of using organic natural methods to live healthy. On this particular day, he was talking about a way one can detox their stomach by flashing warm water through the rectum. Yes, through the rectum. The way water is able to move from the cistern in your bathroom and flash down the contents in the toilet, someone could do the same to their body system and flash out the unwanted contents in the stomach like excess fat. Sandra did not believe it of course because television talk shows can at times be a stage of theater. Whoever has the money can stage a show and the one with the best craft will be able to get a standing ovation. But the idea of getting rid of her 2nd stomach sounded like such a good idea so she decided to do an independent investigation as to whether this was even a feasible idea or if there were results that she could draw courage from to try. To her surprise this seemed to be a popular thing among the people she asked. You could think it had been approved by the CDC and she would not have bothered to try if she had got a testimony from her cousin Aidah who owed her flat stomach to the infamous evacuation detox that she claimed to use time to time.

Manned with the tools for the exercise having taken her son to the grandmother, she was determined to make this happen. It was a Friday afternoon, in the privacy of her home, she had finished boiling the water that would have to be used in the exercise. So apparently you fix a long flexible tube, those tubes like the nasogastric tubes used in hospital when your health has deteriorated so much that you cannot even swallow food, so they have to fix a tube from the nose down to your throat to give you food just to keep you alive. Yes a tube like that now goes all the way into your rectum. The free end is then fixed to a jerrycan with the warm water which creates a flow system. The water apparently fills your bowel and you remove the tube and release the water which should come out with the ‘unwanted’ materials hence doing a detox. Easy right!!! Well for Sandra it was different. Aside the awkwardness of having to fix tubes in uncomfortable places, the water burnt her buttocks instead. What was supposed to be an interesting wonder working exercise, left her walking like she had weights attached to her insides for a number of days as she treated her scalds.

I will never try these self help wonder hacks again, Sandra told me as I tried so hard to swallow the laughter that came from the whole imagination of what that Friday must have looked like. Sandra will probably not read this but if she does, it will be printed and sent by bus 300km from where I am writing this.

If you can, try to eat right so that you do not have to undergo evacuation exercises like Sandra and end up with burnt buttocks.

Lifestyle

The beauty I was unware of

I had my fears as a young girl in school. I noticed part of my skin was beginning to be eaten by something invisible at around the age of 7. It was rather not decided which parts of my body it would devour first. It started with my lips leaving them with a pink lining which to be honest I felt was rather ‘cute’, then later the invisible enemy would splash its weapons to my hands leaving them with discolored little patches spread out. I remember going to my parents concerned that I was sick but they didn’t really show concern. Felt like they had signed a memorandum of understanding with the enemy and did not want to fail on their part, but I later got to understand that they also did not understand what was happening to their sweet child. My mother must have mumbled things along the lines of ‘you are going to be fine‘ but that was as far as it would go. I was not taken to hospital either and I soon gave up too. The beauty of being a child!

In my primary 3 (or grade 3), I remember students reporting me to the teacher that my lips where red because I was drinking waragi (whisky) behind the toilet. (Imagine the shock in my eyes). I wept when the teacher summoned me for questioning partly because I was angry and embarrassed that I could be associated with liquor at such an age let alone waragi for this case, but also I couldn’t explain why my lips were red or rather pink. The events of what happened after seem to be faint but I guess the case died a natural death and life had to continue. Two years after this incident I started seeing the discoloration (white spots) spread to my hands and feet and this time I gathered enough courage to ask my mother what was happening to me. She told me I was born with them just that I had never seen them but it’s not sickness. (aren’t all mothers geniuses with their responses?) For some reason just like the first time I went to them when I was younger, I believed her after all it was mother who had said, even when I was sure that my hands and feet did not have these spots earlier so I stopped worrying that I was sick. The discoloration was most pronounced on my lips but it always looked nice so it was a bonus for me unless I had any ailment, these were the rare cases it would hurt and turn red- I guess because there’s no melanin so it was very sensitive.

Overcoming vitiligo as an insecurity I can confidently say came in high school when I was around 15 years of age. I made friends with a very spirited girl with whom I lived my best life with. We celebrated, loved, ate, studied and cried together. From her I got to understand and appreciate my worth as a young beautiful girl despite what anyone said. She was my ride or die, fought and attacked whoever tried to come at me. It was by her guidance that I got to read about vitiligo and discovered that it is something that I had no control over or change but could use it to compliment myself. I started to see it as something normal like having black hair as the other has blond hair. This does not mean that bad and hurtful things stopped coming to my doorstep. I will give you one last example.

In my senior 6 vacation, I escorted my mother to hospital and a doctor insisted that I be checked for HIV, “there’s no other reason why your lips are pink.” the doctor said. “It has to be AIDS“. My mom agreed and I also believed in the moment I was HIV positive and started imagining all the painful stories I had heard about AIDS victims. The results came that very day and of course I did not have AIDS but these are the challenges we often face.

Very many years later I am now a married woman and will soon be a mother to children of my own. The questions that linger are how far this could spread. Remember vitiligo is affected by external triggers like stress which can influence its progression. About two years ago while in hospital treating an ulcer attack, my physician asked me if I knew the condition I had when he saw the white spots in my hands and feet to which I responded that I did. He told me that this was bound to spread when I get pregnant, so now that I am looking forward to that season not so far from now, I continuously wonder how I will look while pregnant, or if what the doctor alleged was true in the first place.

But hey! it is true what they say, we shall cross that bridge when get there, for now I continue to live my best life.

As told by someone with vitiligo

Lifestyle

Personal style

This week was a cultural and fashion week and I decided not embarrass myself and stick to something that I am most confident in which is culture, mostly on food. (If you have not read on those, you may want to pause right here and swipe back a few pages and enjoy those first. It will make me very happy.) Nevertheless this being the end of the week, I will make an attempt to talk a little about the things I tend to like to wear. I don’t want to call it fashion because I doubt it is anyway.

Favorite color

Many of the colors that I have are in dark tones, particularly black so whenever this question is posed to me, I like to say black is my favorite color. And yes I am one of those girls who believe black is the new pink. I once asked my mother how she would take it if I wore a black gown on my wedding. You guessed right! Just like any African mother, she said I would have to attend that on my own, probably with my husband. It is just of late that I am trying to introduce lighter shades in my wardrobe but a black outfit will always catch my eye.

What does my style say about me?

I am one of those people who don’t subscribe to the saying, “Smartness knows no weather” If it is cold, I will wear a warmer over that dress please, I am not about to freeze please. I will more than often choose comfort over style. I have a group of friends where we decided to respect Sundays which is the day of the Lord so this is the day you will find me ‘overly dressed’ like many like to say. We decided that we shall always dress our best on this day and now it almost happens unconsciously. The rest of the days you will find me in a more casual style, unless I have a very important event to go to. I will more than often choose to wear sneakers over heels. Give me sneakers any day please. I like to say that my daily style is more of a relaxed and free spirited one mixed with confidence and strength. Once in a while I will out do myself but that is when it is really necessary.

Style Icons

Style icons are stylish men and women who have come before us from whom we draw inspiration for our style. This doesn’t mean copying them entirely, but simply noting some of the style choices that also reflect elements of who we are. Now here I will confess that I do not have one, the most that I do is to look at different stylish people especially on Instagram and like their fashion. Rarely does this cross over to my style choices so maybe it is safe to say Instagram is my style icon.

Items I am always drawn to

The moment I walk into a clothing store I immediately gravitate towards the shoe section, particularly for sneakers. Then I will look out for a beautiful black item, could be a dress, skirt, jumper, trousers, it just has to have a hue of black and it will get me hooked.

Not sure if I have done justice to the fashion world but briefly that is what my personal style would look like on a given random day.