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Lifestyle

Blogmas Day 4,5,6,7

Honestly, no one ever prepares you for adulthood, that one can plan and things turn out different. As I started this #BlogmasEdition I promised to be in your faces every single day for 25 days up to Christmas and as we can tell already, I have failed you. But when we fail, we stand up, dust ourselves and continue the journey. The promise I will make is that content for the 25 days will be served, this content coming in every day is what I cannot guarantee anymore. So can we catch up at least and pay this debt? We left off on day 3, so we will continue with Day 4

Throwback to Christmas

My memory for last Christmas is really hazy because a lot of things happened shortly after that Christmas and killed everything for me. But let me try. I remember that Christmas was in the middle of a pandemic, at the height of messy campaigns and my brother had been recently married. As usual, I was at my mother’s and for the first time for Christmas, it was just me and mum. My 2 brothers did not come home this time around so it was new. We went to church, cooked, had our meal (a lot of food as always), had conversations here and there, and that was it. I remember being very lazy to send out individual Christmas messages to friends and family. Shortly after mum broke her leg, a friend of mine died, things were really messed. So that was what happened. Santa better passes by this year with better tidings.

Never have I ever

This is a popular game and a fun one too, best played with drinks. The aim is to loosen up a crowd and get them to be a little more comfortable with one another. The questions range from the simple ones to the harder ones that can get personal. If the question is true, I will take a shot. If it is not the other person takes the shot. So let us try and see how far I can go. Regard this as a virtual edition

  • Never have I ever got a tattoo (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever stood someone up on a date (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever had a speeding ticket (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever ghosted someone’s texts (My shot)
  • Never have I ever lied to get out of going to work (My shot)
  • Never have I ever given a fake name (My shot)
  • Never have I ever dumped someone over text (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever been sick on public transport (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever been thrown out of a bar or club (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever gone skinny dipping (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever gone out with a friend’s ex (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever fallen in love at first sight (My shot)
  • Never have I ever said ‘I love you’ when I didn’t mean it (My shot)
  • Never have I ever been mugged (My shot)
  • Never have I ever broken a bone (My shot)
  • Never have I ever lied about leaving the club early (My shot)
  • Never have I ever dropped my phone in a toilet (My shot)
  • Never have I ever run out on a meal without paying (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever Googled my own name (My shot)
  • Never have I ever forgotten where I parked my car (My shot)
  • Never have I ever fancied a friend’s parent (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever kissed more than one person in one day (Your shot)
  • Never have I ever had to hide a love bite (My shot)

Let us stop there, We should be over my limit already, these shots are too many although you can share with me what surprises you the most.

5 movies to watch to get you Christmasy

I am the wrong one for this, if I thought so hard all that comes to mind is Home Alone and mark you this is because we always watched this one while growing up. Otherwise on Christmas many times the time flies so fast and we end up watching nothing. Let me refer you to my friend Joy for the movies to watch. I will also be trying out this time and I will surely update you.

Amazon.com: Home Alone : Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John  Heard, Roberts Blossom, Catherine O'Hara, Angela Goethals, Devin Ratray,  Gerry Bamman, Hillary Wolf, John Candy, Larry Hankin, Julio Macat, Chris  Columbus,

Favorite Christmas Carols

This is one of my favorites because I love to listen to the Christmas Carols, I will share many of these.

Death robbed us of Philly Lutaya but his legacy lives on through his songs
Taya’s vocals are incredibly beautiful. You will throw nursery rhymes and her vocals will do them justice. I love this song even more with her vocals
This has all the songs we grew up to. I always smile listening to these
I love this song because it feels like a blend of the new music genre and the old and it blended so well. The lyrics are rich too with the reality of what is happening in our modern times.

Let us meet tomorrow, God willing

Lifestyle

5 things I love about Christmas

To write only 5 things I love about Christmas is very limiting because from old the things to love about this season are countless but let me comb through my brain and pick out the top 5. Are you ready?

1. Christmas liturgy

I am a Catholic Christian and Christmas is preceded by a season we call Advent. It is a time of expectant waiting and preparation for both the celebration of the Nativity of Christ at Christmas and the return of Christ at the Second Coming. During advent in mass, we do not sing the Gloria. Just as the Church refrains from the Gloria during Lent, She does the same during Advent, which is another great season of preparation for a greater mystery – the Nativity of Jesus at Christmas. This is because Advent is a penitential season of the Church, just like Lent. Even though the Church sings “Alleluia” during Advent, She gives us this penitential season to call us to the same conversion that St. John the Baptist called the Jews as they awaited the arrival of the Messiah.

Because the Gloria is a prayer/song of joy, it is suppressed during Advent and is not heard until the vigil Mass of Christmas Eve. The return of Gloria in mass excites me a lot. We chant and it is a real celebration signifying the Nativity of the child Jesus. The decorations, the songs all make the liturgy very special for me.

Christmas Vigil Mass – Fr. Innocent Abonyi's pastoral Diary
I love this section which is in nearly every church

2. The food

Of course, I love food in case you were wondering. Christmas has been blamed for getting us to overeat because many families at least in Africa will outdo themselves. This is our excuse to overeat without raising eyebrows. The food is not different from the normal but it is just that it is in plenty. But again it is a festivity so we shouldn’t be surprised. In our household, our mother is the main chef of the day and it doesn’t matter whether 2 people showed up for Christmas that year, she will cook everything there is. There is always too much food but all that said and done, I love the food even when I am left immobile for a while.

Christmas family dinner traditional African food | Food, African food,  Family dinner
Most lunch tables here in Africa will look something close to this

3. The Holidays

This is a perfect time to go slow on the hustle and bustle of life. We take off some time to breathe, put our legs up, sleep longer and not worry about a meeting or clients. It may be for a few days but it is worth it. I know this is not for everyone but at least for the most majority, it is a constant. People are able to catch up with family and some even get the opportunity to check on their parents. I love the holidays. If there is a vacation in there, the better.

Time To Relax - Live Online Radio

4. Play dress up

The young girl in me still looks forward to dressing up for Christmas. When we were still younger, Christmas translated to a new dress, but now that we are older we look forward to being smartly dressed even if the dress is not new. I love to watch the glee on children’s faces as they show up for mass on Christmas day. It is always evident that they have a new ensemble and would like the whole world to know it. Christmas dress-up is pure joy.

Buy Girls Princess Cinderella Belle Aurora Jasmine Dress Up Costume  Halloween Fancy Dress with Accessories Online in Turkey. 234053186

5. Christmas songs

Christmas songs are always taken out at the end of the year but they never grow old. I love to listen to Christmas songs. They are nostalgic and carry with them very many memories from the old good times. These songs are the ones that always usher us into December and I love them.

Bonus; Christmas decorations

Like I said in the beginning, 5 is too limiting so I had to throw in a bonus one. There is a tree that we used to cut while we were young, I don’t know the English name but most Ugandans know ‘akakomera’. It also doubled as a fence in many homes before concrete walls robbed us of the joy of community. These days we have modern Christmas trees that can be re-used and don’t leave a whole mess like the other one but it still does not beat the original tree. There is something about this Christmas decor that adds to the hype of the season. Decorating as a family also gives quality time to catch up.

Replanting Cut Trees - Can You Replant A Cut Christmas Tree

What are the 5 things you love about Christmas?

Lifestyle

My Christmas wishlist for 2021

As promised, I had to play catch up and this is the blog meant for today. This #Blogmas has to be done no matter what. So how about we begin with wishlists.

The Christmas season is known for giving and receiving gifts. The hustle and bustle of the season can sometimes obscure the reasons for the tradition of giving gifts at Christmas and honestly as one grows it requires one to be intentional in order to keep this tradition as it could grow tired. So here is my Christmas wishlist. If I received all of them, hooray!!!! How awesome this would be! If I receive even one I would be elated. 2021 has not been very kind, but I am determined to end it with a bang.

1. Bookshelf Desk

Half my time I am writing, reading, or doing both so I have been obsessing over a perfect bookshelf desk that can have us both (the books and the writer). COVID19 came with so many things including longer work-from-home sessions. This is would be a perfect fit.

Solid Wood Desk Bookshelf Combination, Study Table – Mr Nanyang
See perfection

2. Watch

Rose Gold Boyfriend Watch Bracelet Set | Claire's
Rose Gold Bracelet watch set

I am the kind of girl who will wear the same watch for years. I have had this silver watch for close to 5 years and on one fateful day, I got on this motorcycle one early Monday morning, and 10 minutes into our ride we were on the ground kissing the dust. No, no bones were broken, just a bruised pinky finger and knee but my lovely watch paid the price. The screen cracked but I continued to wear it for the next 8 months. 2 weeks ago the crack caved. So this has got to appear on my wishlist. It is something I have to get

3. Centonomy 101

Centonomy 101 is a 12-week online Personal Financial Management program with the February intake starting on 15th February 2022. It is a dream course I have always wanted to do for a while now. This course helps one learn how to manage their money and debt, how investments work, and how to protect their money. The tuition fee for Centonomy 101 is now Kes 41,500 (Inclusive of 16% VAT and the registration fee of Kes 1,500)

4. Perfume collection

KSA - 10 Best Women's Perfumes Women Perfume Set, Carolina Herrera, Chanel,  Christian Dior, Giorgio Armani, Gucci, Narciso, Yves Saint Laurent | 7/24

Can we spoil this little girl? I love to smell good, and a good perfume collection is a sure happy charm for me. I will not be rigid on the labels, but a good scent perfume collection will pass

5. Boots

My girl Joy, I will follow in your footsteps for this. Did I mention this is my last item? No need to get overwhelmed. Every girl has staples in their wardrobe and comfortable shoes are a must-have for me. Since Canvas shoes are overflowing in this household, let us try boots this time.

YOUYEDIAN Boots Women 2018 Autumn Ankle Boots For Women Thin Heel Zipper  Casual Female Shoes Leather Boots Botas Mujer|Ankle Boots| - AliExpress
Wow

I really love all the items I’ve rounded up in My Christmas Wish List for 2021 and I hope you can also borrow some ideas for yourself, friends, or family. If you end up grabbing an item in this post for yourself, be sure to leave a comment below!

Lifestyle

Blogmas is upon us

December is a happy month for so many of us including me, mostly because of Christmas or should I say holidays, but also because the year is ending. I won’t lie that this year has not been easy for many of us but there is always a silver lining on every cloud.

So this is me trying to be hyped for this season and would like to take you along so we are going to be in each other’s faces for the next 25 days. There is this thing called Blogmas. Honestly, I was more familiar with Vlogmas, something YouTubers do every Christmas season where they create content for their viewers for 25 days starting on 1st December till Christmas. Now that I know that it is legal for bloggers too to have ours, I could not resist.

What is Blogmas?

Blogmas is a season in December where bloggers make blog posts daily from the 1st December till the 25th sharing Christmas content and everything in between. This is what we will do on here. Technically this should have been sent out yesterday which was 1st December but life was happening to me and the day went by. I will put out 2 posts today at least to catch up.

Let us be jolly as the season to be is here. Should you have something you would want me to write about, (Christmas Content), please be sure to put it in the comment section and I will gladly oblige.

Tis’ the season to be jolly, so let us have a badass Blogmas

See you later

Lifestyle, Nutrition

6 emotions parents and guardians of children with disability go through

We often do not mind disability until it comes knocking at our doorstep. Everyone as long as we live is liable to interfacing with a disability at one time, either by it happening to us, to our very own, or to one we know.

In my line of work, I work very closely with children that have a disability (usually one that affects feeding) but it breaks my heart that usually these parents and guardians feel that during the course of their life, they must have stepped someone’s toe and they have to pay for it that way. The bitter truth is no one is shy of disability. Anyone like I said can interface with disability at any point in their life.

It is our duty to be empathetic to these persons, not sympathize please, it sucks but emphathetic. Today I am just here to mention that having a child with a disability is difficult, there are so many emotions at play without enough time to process them. In my book, Differently Abled Nutrition (you can order a copy here); a book I wrote for parents and guardians who have children that have a disability that affects feeding, I talk about these emotions in detail and so much more.

Get yourself a copy of this book, gift someone you believe needs it. Together we can be empathetic by sharing useful knowledge.

Dear parent, your emotions are valid

Denial

This is where it usually begins. You sit across that table and the doctor breaks the news that your bundle of joy is going to be a little bit atypical. Or your child is growing and not hitting the milestones as expected only for the physician to break the news that there will be some delays, the first ship you often the board is the denial ship.

Denial is refusing to acknowledge or accept that your child has a disability. First, there is blame apportioned to self and for some pregnant women whose child has not yet seen the face of the earth battle depression and the thoughts of not continuing through with the pregnancy increase. It is only sad that some of our colleagues in the practice only fuel these thoughts but offering the option to terminate the pregnancy. My dead one, this emotion is valid, just don’t stay there, don’t walk alone

Anger

Anger and denial are siblings who often ride together. Many times when this news is broken, you do not throw a party in your backyard. Questions like ‘why me?’, ‘what didn’t I do right?’, e.t.c run through your mind over and over again. When the stress becomes too much, it then boils into anger. The anger can be shown outwardly in form of rage or it can get one to withdraw due to the overwhelming feelings of guilt and shame. Displacement of anger is often seen among parents expressing itself through verbal attacks on anyone who may blame them for their ‘unfortunate’ circumstances.

This emotion too is valid my dear one, normal and purely understandable as a way of acknowledging the injustice that has been done on your child. The important thing here is to try and find some balance not to be carried away. This is most likely not done alone. The sad reality is that many marriages crumble at this point so try and find help

Fear

Fear is defined as an unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain or harm. This is another emotion that is very common and perfectly valid. Fear often arises from the uncertainty of what to expect in the future as the child grows. It is burdensome for a parent to know that they are their children’s only defence and protection and when they are away from the child despite them growing into an adult, the child is vulnerable to attack, mockery, ridicule and difficulty in living. The imagination of society’s rejection for their little one coupled with the health challenges bound to be faced leaves parents gripped with fear.

This emotion usually breeds bargain where parents begin an unending journey of looking for a permanent cure or miracle to return their child to normalcy. Unfortunately many are ‘duped’ of even the little resources they have in exchange for empty promises.

Grief

This emotion is filled with a tremendous sense of loss that parents feel upon learning of their children’s apparent disability. This emotion just like the ones above is valid. We usually spend a lot of our lives making dreams that we would want for our children when the time comes so anything that interrupts this dream is extremely unsettling and brings with it a lot of grief. Allow yourself go through this emotion, try not to fight it, get help if it is possible but most importantly, do not stay there.

Guilt and depression

This emotion is often caused by the constant challenges parents and guardians face as they care for their children who have a disability ranging from social isolation, financial strain, outright exhaustion, feelings of confusion. Often time if these feelings remain and the person does not find relief, they can fall into deeper depression which could manifest in form of insomnia, fatigue, low self esteem, social isolation, changes in appetite to mention but a few. Valid an emotion as it is, it is important to seek help as it comes with compromised mental health for the parent.

Acceptance

Of all emotions, I love to call this the ‘happy emotion’. At this stage, the parent begins to dream again. They have gone through lots of emotions and have tasted the grief and fear, processed them well enough to know that all is not lost and they can dream again. At this stage, they are fully involved in the child’s life and activities, fully mastered their communication traits and can understand their emotions. Life becomes as normal as it can get and if there are siblings at home, they have fully understood how to handle and deal with their brother or sister. This is a grateful phase where parents are thankful for every step reached.

In conclusion

There is no definite line to demarcate the end and beginning of an emotion. They keep over lapping each other, a roller coaster of sorts and one often circles from one emotion to the other. There are always good emotional and bad emotional days, but when the good days outweigh the bad emotional days then we can comfortably say that we are good to go. It takes time but allow yourself to experience every emotion without feeling guilty. Try as much as possible to get all the help you need, but most importantly do not walk the journey alone.